Allison what happened? you sounded so worried and down on phone is everything okay? I had to cancel my date with lolade and i didn’t find that really appropriate
‘before i knew what was happening, her lips was on mine and I couldn’t resist it’ it was like old times, she was barely wearing anything. the see through camisole was showing everything that needs to be covered. she doesn’t even look like someone that has breast feed a baby before, it was firm like that of a sixteen year old’
I know you like it Tobi, please stop denying it. the way you responded back to my kiss, the way you grabbed my face and the little moan you let out. I just wanted to make sure you still feel something for me before i breathe my last breath.
what nonsense are you jabbing about? what is wrong with you? your last what?
Allison talk to me what are you saying?
Tobi, it’s so nice of you to still care and worry about me, it’s like you never stopped caring you just pretending to start something with that small girl just to kill the feelings.
that small girl you talking about, for your information she was really worried when i told her you sounded frightened on phone. please tell me what small girl will think that way. I care because you are the mother of my son and we need to just put up a good relationship for him. and by relationship i meant been friends and work out being a good parent ‘Jesus nothing is sounding right now but you know what i mean and stop giving me that suspicious smile’
so tell me why did you say your last breath, because i won’t be happy with you if you only call me down here to just kiss me like a crazy person and assume i can be at your beck and call.
Allison say something ‘i yelled’
‘stop yelling Tobi, because am going to die anyway so just stop treating me like trash please’
am sorry but can you please tell me what’s going on with you?
The reason i left that morning was because i found out i had cancer
wait, can what? are you kidding me now? i don’t even know what to say to you right now, am speechless because nothing from mouth will make any sense. i don’t know why you didn’t tell me all these, you think i won’t support you right? I loved you so much and you knew that but you choose to handle things your own way.
‘while i was staring at her, i noticed she was looking pale and a little bit thin. she placed her lips on mine again but i didn’t resist because i don’t want to hurt her anymore. she is the mother of my son, the woman i use to love and now am going to loose her finally. I know it’s not sounding right, i wish she had told me immediately she found out.
The thought of hurting lolade striked my heart while i was kissing Allison ‘Lord please let this moment sort itself out’ but somehow i know it’s up to me to work things out the right way.
I drew Allison closer and assure her we would get through this together. so please tell me everything, am not in a hurry because am ready to listen to everything you have to say.
‘she sighed heavily’ mum and dad were involved in a ghastly car accident while driving home one night ‘she sobs and i felt her pain’ since i found out about my health condition Bryan has been the one taking care of me and when i gave birth to Shawn he was like a father to him.
Am his father now, so there is no need for that and I will Make Up for lost time.
“my phone rings, it’s lolade”
Allison was resting peacefully on my chest, i didn’t want to disturb her so i dropped the call and texted her immediately that i would call her later.
lolade is very understanding, she is everything i want in a woman but with all these going on, how would she cope ‘i asked myself’ as of now am responsible for Allison because she has nobody.
when got home, i didn’t remember to call lolade back and explained to her what Happened.
for almost a month i was shuffling between work and taking Allison to the hospital for checkup, had little time for Shawn and mum but during this time lolade was also busy with her finals. all my attention was with Allison, have canceled more date with lolade than school holidays just because i know how understanding she is.
she was always coming to see mum, go out with Shawn, help out with his home work, leaving me messages to check on me.
after 6months of my irregularities with my loved ones, i explained to them all what happened and why i felt i was indebted to Allison because she had no one. mother wasn’t convinced with the whole Allison story, somehow she believed it was all made up and here i am falling into the same trap again. her concern now is about people am hurting with my selfish decisions and not considering their own happiness. these includes her (my mum), lolade and Shawn which i claimed to Make Up for lost time with him.
one morning, i realised if i don’t do something fast, am going to loose the one person that cares so much about me. i arranged a surprised dinner date for lolade. I sent a box to her door step, which contains a dinner gown, shoe, and a large bouquet of flowers with a small note saying ‘just stay with me’
have made arrangements, i rented out a small space just two of us, a live band playing, chefs, waiters at our disposal. Though am not good at this kind of things but mum helped me and it came out so perfectly. i just hope it would meet her expectations.
some hrs later she was walking down to me led by a waiter, looking so elegant and beautiful. something different about her, she was looking more confident, bold and a lot grown up. even when i have never seen her as too young but one thing missing from all this, she was not smiling. i took her by the hand and kiss it gently, i pulled out the chair and she replied thank you.
‘Tobi this is really lovely’ she smiled a little.
what is wrong my darling? ‘i asked her’ I tried searching for answers by looking straight into her eyes but to my surprise she wasn’t shy to look back into my eyes and this makes me a little uncomfortable. i like her been confident but it’s like what makes her different and draw me to her is that little girl altitude of hers.
Tobi what is this dinner all about please?
no response from me because the question hit me like a shock and by looking in her face, it so certain that she needs an answer to the question that instant.
Lolade Dawson, i know have not been a good boyfriend to you, i know it seems like i don’t care about you, about us but i promise it’s not like that. you are the first person i think of when i wake up in the morning, and the last person before i go to sleep.
The note i sent to you, i meant that three words. am so messed up when it comes to been romantic but am willing to learn and just give myself to you and nothing means more than spending every minutes with you.
‘she smiled’ oh thank you for the smile, it’s a relief because am running out of words to say.
Tobi, promises are easy to make but fulfilling is what matters. i don’t want you to make me any promise now and you won’t be able to fulfill or keep it. falling inlove with you is ‘and she stops’
wait lolade you are in love with me? oh my heavens, i can’t believe my ears. i was shocked, didn’t know what to say, it’s like am 80% backwards and she is going forward and wants everything to be in place. i totally understand how she feels right now and i led her on without the hope of thinking anything else will interfere with this.
I didn’t even know i was lost in thought, she was searching my eyes for words and answers just to be sure of what i was going to say about the whole thing.
lolade i really appreciate your understanding and everything you have been through with me but now it’s just that everything is complicated. my son, and Allison they really need me so much
she was just staring at me and right now i know am really hurting her ‘Derek was right and i hate to admit this’ i want the best for you but i just don’t know how to go about all these and it’s really consuming all my energy.
you just asked me to stay with you and i haven’t even given you my answer yet”
Tobi its okay, i totally understand and i respect your wish. am truly sorry for compounding the whole pressure on ground with my childish love confession. I pray God give you strength and knowledge to do what is right for both of them. “pls take me home”
lolade please, i don’t want us to be this way or end this night like this please i beg you.
well, i don’t know what else you want me to do. you want me to stick around and be an alternative for you if everything didn’t go as planned? am not robot, flesh and blood runs through me and i have fears, pains and hurt too but have never taken advantage of you with all these. cancer is a life threatening ailments that need serious attention, love and support to whoever is going through it.
Tobi, i wish you all the best in everything you do and i will always pray for you. one more thing i have no regret knowing you, i have no regret confessing my love to you because am a woman and won’t deny what i feel and want to have. allowing me to feel loved and have a family again was one of the best thing anyone has done for me but cutting it short wasn’t part of what i had in mind. “it is true we can never predict human being” don’t bother taking me home Sir, save the energy for your more pressing matters.
thank you for the dinner, it was really lovely. and by the way Tobi, she needs you more than i do, please go and support her.
i couldn’t sleep that night, was really worried about everything. even before i called lolade to check on her, she texted me she was home and asked me to get enough rest.
what kind of woman is lolade? she is too rare and the thought of loosing her was just too scary for me to imagine. she wasn’t afraid to profess her love for me, yet i pushed her away all in the name of trying to protect her from my life drama. but is Allison worth all these sacrifice? i can’t even remember the last time i had a moment with my son and mum. right now i didn’t even know anything about lolade’s finals or health yet am here giving it all away in the name of saving someone who left me shattered.
few weeks later, i was driving home from Allion’s place really tired and unhappy when suddenly, i saw a young man helping his pregnant wife get down from the car. The way he stared at her, the way he was showing her support and the smile from her face was priceless. The thought of lolade flashed across my mind and at that moment i needed to see her so bad and tell her how i have this butterflies in my stomach each time she looked deep in my eyes, how her smile makes my knee weak, how her lip biting makes me want to kiss her forever but will she accept me.
few minutes later
knock at her door severally no response, I tried her two digits no response still. My goodness why did i wait this long to talk to her, what kind of drama am i protecting her from? i just lost my wife ‘yes i want her to be my wife and my everything’
fortunately an elderly woman who seems to know me well came out of her own apartment to answer me ‘young man, good evening how are you? ‘i responded’ she didn’t ask much questions because somehow she knew i was looking for lolade.
she told me she saw her yesterday with bags and it seems she was traveling or relocating somewhere. young man are you her boyfriend? no ma’am, am her husband to be.
congrats, she is a lovely girl and well put together am very sure you won’t hurt her because she seems to adore you by way she looks at you.
don’t be surprised am an elderly woman, and i see things.
when i got home, i had no strength to do anything so, i just did a slow moon walk to my room to cry my eyes out and lock myself inside forever when i opened the door lolade was on the bed sleeping like an Angel.
sorry guys its coming a little bit late, trying to set up my YouTube channel 😊😊 just two more episodes for marry for mama “am so happy”don’t forget to follow my blog and comment, God bless you.